I've said it before and I'll say it again. Whoever it was at Fox who said, "You know who would be great to judge our new singing contest? Paula Abdul." is both pure genius and crazy as a loon. Little did that man/ woman/ Number 5 robot know that the suggestion would eventually lead to this masterpiece.

And in case you missed round 1 of American Idol last night, the boys were pretty fantastic! That guy with the dreads had a pretty chill Jack-Johnson-feel, and I just want to squeeze that cute little one that Simon can't get enough of.

I propose an American Idol drinking game:
A drink every time Simon says, "you've just got it."
...every time Randy and Paula say, "it was a little pitchy in parts"
...every time Ryan acts like a tool...no wait, scratch that, you wouldn't make it through the show
...and every time the camera man randomly zooms in on someone in the audience for 5 seconds during the middle of a solo...

Let the games begin!